Environmentally Friendly Florescent Cancer Bulbs

Here is another gem, this time brought to you by the regular-light-bulb-o-phobes who insist on saving the environment at the expense of us humans. The article states that for some people the light emitted from a florescent light bulb can cause skin cancer. I love the idea of saving our environment but if we all get cancer and die no one will be around to enjoy it. Go figure!

Passenger jets get anti-missile devices

Commercial airliners will now be outfitted with a new anti-missile devise for the protection against terrorist attacks. For every devise installed the planes will also be outfitted with a brand new bumper sticker to warn off any would-be terrorist from attacking the plane. Personally I will only fly in planes with these stickers prominently displayed on the tail fin. That will show them not to mess with us.

Outsourcing Birth to India

Its finally here folks, now you can outsource the birth of your baby to India. We outsource everything else why not babys as well? What mother in her right mind wants to be overtaken by an "alien" for 9 months? What sane woman wants to go through 38 hours of labor? Now all you have to do is ship an impregnated egg via FedEx overnight to India and they will do the rest. They will find a willing woman who needs some cash on the side and you get a part number to track the progress of your baby. When your baby is born they ship it back to you overnight, via FedEx again and boom you are a parental unit ready to go. And since you spent so much money with them they will throw in this really cool bumper sticker. I know this will be a hit in Hollywood and its going to put the plastic surgeons out of business. Look out Dr 90210 the future is here and youre not in it.

I left my Arm and Leg in SF... Zoo

Back in the good-ol-days most people left their hearts in San Francisco, now days you end up leaving more than that if you happen to visit the SF Zoo. You might end loosing an arm and a leg if you dare go near the wild cat exhibit. Heaven forbid you tell them you are a "Christian" at the door, you might end been thrown in the lions den by Director Manuel Mollinedo himself. Or maybe its a Putin Plot, to send in siberian tiger "secret agents" to destroy the tourist trade in SF. Too late, Mayor Gavin Newsom took care of that with his wacky city policies.

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Antarctic Fight Club

Not to be outdone by the Jesus Fight Club in Bethlehem, a couple of scientists started the Antarctic Fight Club chapter at a remote South Pole facility. Apparently it was described as a "drunken Christmas punch-up". Maybe the last minute shopping while drunk in subzero temperatures that was the cause of this brawl, I don't know but I will continue to be on the look out for other fight clubs as they unfold.

Jesus Fight Club

A new tradition has been born for the day after the birth of Jesus at the Church of the Nativity in Bethlehem. What better way to celebrate the day after than to fight in the church built at the actual location where Jesus was born. So in commemorating this new tradition I created a "Jesus Fight Club" for those who are members of this elite new group. This bumper sticker has been long overdue, and for those who fight in Jesus name, thank you.

Leave Britney Alone!

One of this years top viral videos to hit YouTube was Chris Crockers passioned plea for the rest of us to just "Leave Britney Alone." The question is WWCRD? or What Would Chris Crocker Do? He would ask the jackals in the media who have nothing better to do than tear people down, to leave her alone. And while they are at it, leave those who regularly appear on the supermarket check out stands alone as well. Frankly it makes me sick and sad that these people are constantly hounded by the media who make their money on sucking the life out of people. I say we should all take up Crocker's war cry and reject the media that feeds on a daily basis on the lives of these people. And in case you haven't seen the video yet, here it is.

My bumper sticker is better than yours

Let's start with the mother of all bumper stickers, that will basically render all others null and void. Quit wasting time an effort answering and responding to all the dumb stickers out there. This beauty will do the job you don't want to do, you will not only save time, but money as well. It will give you your life pack and it might even reverse the aging process caused by worry and stress over other peoples views that make you crazy. Click on the image above to get yours today.

What is a Bumber Sticker?

A bumper sticker is a sound bite that enables others to make quick judgements about who they think you are. Its a verbal hit and run, on the part of the owner of the bumper sticker. They hit you with their statement and drive away leaving you stunned, angry and scratching your head. I Like to call it English 2.0 for those of us you don't have time for lengthy mission statements on our may to work. Its a quick way to take sides and fire your daily volley across the bow of the car behind you. This blog is about deconstructing those "Mission Statements" for you on a daily basis.